i found out that im still in love with you
illegitimus non carborundum est
10.2.07
5.2.07
still the weekend?
well i dont know because i never fell asleep
i got the new drop dead, gorgeous album
and a tshirt.
it came with extra stickers.
sweet.
illegitimus non carborundum est
i got the new drop dead, gorgeous album
and a tshirt.
it came with extra stickers.
sweet.
illegitimus non carborundum est
4.2.07
3.2.07
puma
and im not having a good nite
and im ok
but i dont like being alone
alone is the same as lonely now
and i downloaded bob sinclair
and i love it
and its reminding me too much of florence
and the pictures
and everything.
and a favorite part of florence for me is gone.
the jacket that i got for my birthday was stolen.
just taken from my seat at this bar.
and i want to fall apart, because stupidly enough that jacket meant the world to me.
you and i.
we went there.
we picked those out.
we couldnt afford them.
and i got it.
my best friend in florence got it for me.
and i got to carry around florence on my shoulders everyday.
and i got to think of something from florence everyday when i put it on.
and its gone.
it was iconic.
i cant believe im actually about to cry over a jacket.
i didnt bring anything to new york from florence.
except that jacket and your bracelet.
maybe its just an avenue.
maybe i just needed that jacket taken so that i can just cry.
but i wont cry.
ill save the salty drops for something else.
youre supposed to be here. and youre not. and i cant blame anything for it. and i hate that. no i dont want to blame, but i need there to be a reason why. and there isnt. its just how it is.
im ok.
thank you for talking tonite.
mi piace.
non un po', ma...
molto.
buona notte.
illegitimus non carborundum est
and im ok
but i dont like being alone
alone is the same as lonely now
and i downloaded bob sinclair
and i love it
and its reminding me too much of florence
and the pictures
and everything.
and a favorite part of florence for me is gone.
the jacket that i got for my birthday was stolen.
just taken from my seat at this bar.
and i want to fall apart, because stupidly enough that jacket meant the world to me.
you and i.
we went there.
we picked those out.
we couldnt afford them.
and i got it.
my best friend in florence got it for me.
and i got to carry around florence on my shoulders everyday.
and i got to think of something from florence everyday when i put it on.
and its gone.
it was iconic.
i cant believe im actually about to cry over a jacket.
i didnt bring anything to new york from florence.
except that jacket and your bracelet.
maybe its just an avenue.
maybe i just needed that jacket taken so that i can just cry.
but i wont cry.
ill save the salty drops for something else.
youre supposed to be here. and youre not. and i cant blame anything for it. and i hate that. no i dont want to blame, but i need there to be a reason why. and there isnt. its just how it is.
im ok.
thank you for talking tonite.
mi piace.
non un po', ma...
molto.
buona notte.
illegitimus non carborundum est
2.2.07
scribbling on bathroom walls
i had practice tonite. im outta shape. i went to the bathroom twice and just puked everything out. i loved it.
i interviewed with the chef of mas [farmhouse] today and he is giving me a part time position. that lasy still hasnt called back from the new york aids coalition. im trying to work for them for free and they wont get an interview with me.
i got the fabri fibra album. i love italian music. the only rap ill listen too.
so i dont read, rite? like i hate reading, but ive been doin so much for my classes. this is the most reading ive ever had. and im doin probably 85% of it. the rest of the time is still generally for work, but some other whatever involved. clearly.
so today for my international ngo class we had to take these fifty values, like moral type of things, make ten high on our list, at least five low, and anything else medium. then we had to do this scoring thing, see if any of the highs changed. then write down our top five values, the things we consider most important to us, like creativity, integrity, family, religion, that kinda stuff, one per note card. five note cards. then the prof came around and said now, which one do you want to get rid of. so we had to choose from the five hiest values in our lives which one we would toss. so she grabbed one card from each person. then she stands at the front and reads the cards saying "this person is throwing away their loyalty. this person is throwing away love and affection." we listened to about thirty of these and watched her throw away each card after she said it. she did this for the top four, coming to the last two saying, "now you can keep one. which will it be?" then she read out what we were all keeping, but we had to make a copy of what value we were keeping, so that we could hold on to it. you dont want to
leave with her having thrown away every value. it was really really intense. i didnt think id care that much. but at the end i was really upset. no personal relationships, as in nothing having to do with another person even made it into my top ten. that was one of the most emotionally draining experiences of my life. even without all the emotions.
illegitimus non carborundum est
i interviewed with the chef of mas [farmhouse] today and he is giving me a part time position. that lasy still hasnt called back from the new york aids coalition. im trying to work for them for free and they wont get an interview with me.
i got the fabri fibra album. i love italian music. the only rap ill listen too.
so i dont read, rite? like i hate reading, but ive been doin so much for my classes. this is the most reading ive ever had. and im doin probably 85% of it. the rest of the time is still generally for work, but some other whatever involved. clearly.
so today for my international ngo class we had to take these fifty values, like moral type of things, make ten high on our list, at least five low, and anything else medium. then we had to do this scoring thing, see if any of the highs changed. then write down our top five values, the things we consider most important to us, like creativity, integrity, family, religion, that kinda stuff, one per note card. five note cards. then the prof came around and said now, which one do you want to get rid of. so we had to choose from the five hiest values in our lives which one we would toss. so she grabbed one card from each person. then she stands at the front and reads the cards saying "this person is throwing away their loyalty. this person is throwing away love and affection." we listened to about thirty of these and watched her throw away each card after she said it. she did this for the top four, coming to the last two saying, "now you can keep one. which will it be?" then she read out what we were all keeping, but we had to make a copy of what value we were keeping, so that we could hold on to it. you dont want to
leave with her having thrown away every value. it was really really intense. i didnt think id care that much. but at the end i was really upset. no personal relationships, as in nothing having to do with another person even made it into my top ten. that was one of the most emotionally draining experiences of my life. even without all the emotions.
illegitimus non carborundum est
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